week1 question 3

What we talk about when we talk about love
This short story provides the reader with two of the most common types of love people deal with. People often believe that life is either black or white. Mr. Carver focused on two types of love, spiritual and obsessive to include violence. Mel, a character in this short story believed in spiritual love, he inherited this type of love while spending five years in a seminary. Terri, Mel’s second wife was previously married to a man who loved her but was described as being violently obsessed with her. Terri’s first husbands Ed beat her and wanted her dead. Terri and Mel went back and forth on this subject debating whether it was love or not, Terri insisted it was and Mel felt it was impossible to think this man loved her. Mel’s belief on his spiritual love is the more traditional take on what love is and should be. My personal belief about love relates more with Mel’s definition. However, I do understand Terri’s belief and also agree with her to an extent. Terri’s past experience of love is not traditional on any level. Her experience of love somewhat challenges my personal beliefs because I do understand Terri when she says that she knows that Ed loved her. I do not agree with hurting someone you love but some people are unable express emotions like others and in a sick way it was obvious he loved her because he untimely killed himself on account of him not being able to have her. This is an odd and nauseating form of love but in terms of “black and white” I can understand that Ed truly did love Terri. I suppose this is a type of romantic love even though it is somewhat challenges my beliefs of romantic love. Ed was obsessed with Terri, he could not live with or without her and in a disgusting way this is a form of love. It’s hard for me to declare his love any less precious then Mel’s current love for Terri. I am a romantic lover that lives like Mel but Ed was also a romantic lover.